Prayer

How do I treat prayer when it comes to my kids?  John and I talked about this at great lengths recently and while we both can remember growing up going to church all the time, going on mission trips, and being active in our home churches neither of us can remember our parents praying out loud over us.  I am quite confident both sets of our parents prayed FOR us and I know we always said the blessing before a meal but out loud prayers of blessings over us before we left for school or went to bed?  That wasn't something either of us can remember in our homes.  So we want to be intentional about letting our kids hear us praying rather than just over the dinner table each night.

John usually puts Josh and Colin to bed each night and they say prayers together.  However, Josh is in a rut of saying "Just pray for the usual stuff" when asked what he would like to pray about.  Colin, as I have mentioned, will pray for things ranging from animals to chicken nuggets so you just never know.  We talked about not only having them say things they would like to pray for or about but also for them to hear us pray specifically for them.  Nothing long and drawn out...just a prayer of blessing over them.  With the two of them we are working toward having them think more about things to pray for...things they are thankful for...things that are on their hearts for their friends.

Now.  Patrick.  Somewhere along the way he turned into a teenager and he kind of puts himself to bed now.  He doesn't really need us to tuck him in or get him one more drink of water or make sure he has the right stuffed animal to help him go to sleep.  And somewhere along the way we stopped praying with or for him.  I guess we fell into the trap of thinking that he's 15...he doesn't want us to do that...he should be praying on his own...he will think we are crazy...etc.

I do think Patrick is at an age where his relationship with Christ is just that...HIS relationship.  It should no longer be what me or John want for him but needs to be more of his personal connection.  HOWEVER, we have missed the boat on continuing to let him hear us pray over him and let him know that not only do we pray FOR him but WITH him.

So I decided a few weeks ago that I would go up to his room before he went to bed and I would pray over him.  I was all geared up to do it...I gathered my thoughts...I walked up the stairs...I stood outside of his door...and...I chickened out.  I went in, said goodnight and then walked back down to our room all mad at myself and confused by my feelings.  Why would I be scared to go pray for my kid?  What was wrong with me?

Jump to the next night.  I'm going to do this.  I CAN pray with my child.  Come on, Kristin!  Get it together!  I gathered my thoughts.  I walked up the stairs and I noticed I had butterflies in my stomach.  My hands felt clammy. 

This isn't exactly great spiritual parenting if you are nervous about going up to pray for your child.  I felt like a complete and utter failure and started to turn back around and tell myself that Patrick was too old for this.  He didn't want his Mom to come pray over him before he went to bed.  This is something I should have been doing from the time he was little bitty...not something to start at his age. 

Then God convicted my heart so strongly that that was EXACTLY what my child needed whether he was 15 or 18 or 20...that from here on out he needs to have his Mother pray over him for every single night he is sleeping under my roof.

So I marched myself right up the stairs and walked boldly into his room and asked him if he could shut down his computer game.  He asked if he was in trouble and I told him that no...I wanted to pray for him before he went to bed.

And that 15 year old teenager who I thought didn't want his Mom to stand over him and pray, stood up and walked toward me (He is now about 1/2 an inch taller than I am) wrapped his arms around me and rested his head on my shoulder without saying a word.  And I prayed for him.  For his safety.  For him to remember who he belongs to and to always reflect God's love to those around him.  And I prayed for the young lady that will one day be his wife...for her to be a godly wife for my son and a godly mother for the children I hope God blesses him with. 

Nothing deep in theology...no flowery prose...just a quick prayer of thanksgiving for God allowing me to be the mother of such a neat kid and for God to continue to guide him and keep him.

My kid who I thought would think I'm crazy (and he still might) pulled away and said, "Thanks, Mom" and gave me a quick hug and settled in for the night. 

If you don't pray out loud over your kids, consider doing so.  I know as parents we pray for our kids silently constantly.  We want the very best for them.  We want to protect them from all the yuck out there and we want them to grow into happy, successful people.  But, our most important role as a parent is to always point them to the cross. 

We are still working out the kinks in our night-time routines and I can't say that since that night I haven't forgotten once or twice as we got caught up in the rush of the day ending but it is something we are definitely doing more consistently.

Let your kids hear you pray out loud...not just over the dinner table...but hear you pray for them.